What was in the bag: a hundred other bags,
each filled with a star. What came after the world:
silence, lots of it. Like being in a bag for a year,
a portable hole, losing the sensation of sound.
After only two nights stars appear
where there were none. So: I’m sorry. I’m here,
not the star of this poem, nor are you. Nor beauties
in bags draped down by the river in books about bodies
and necks stretching upwards to sky. What comes after beauty
is water, just water, nothing reflecting in it, not even the song
of water. Drink. Take this. It’s yours. There’s no one at work
in the world. No dogs rambling the park.
Nothing in darkness or pressure arising by depth.
What was in the works but ears, ears everywhere,
on the land like leaves, caught up in updrafts like silk,
like slick maps written on it and worn on a body.
You know it’s a beauty. Even seen from a mile,
at which point it’s only a dot, it stretches and grows.
Comes closer. She’s coming for you. She walks like a star.
Towards you. In her bag is a book. Each page
draped with stars. You’ll know her
when she arrives. You’ve seen her breathing before.” —“More Precisely,” Ander Monson (via vlorin)
The Time Spent With The One You Want Is Terrible (Even If It’s Amazing)
A highly sought after, far too rare opportunity to spend time with the one you want comes – so you can’t pass it up. Well technically you could, but you won’t. You hang out so infrequently, that you’re used to impromptu invites and making spontaneous trips to talk or hang with her/him. There’s an unfortunate set of circumstances that make it virtually impossible to have concrete, calendar-marked plans with this person, so you’ve got to take what you can get. When you’re starving for their time and attention, this is an opportunity for sustenance. The scraps and crumbs of their busy schedule will serve as nourishment. Very little, but that’s better than nothing… right?
The issue that arises from this scenario depends upon how enjoyable the brief time together was. If it went terribly wrong, you’ll desperately want another opportunity to fix that and make it as awesome as you imagined it being. However, if it was mind-blowingly delightful, things are no less complex. Now you’ll be craving more days like that one, wondering when the next occasion for face time will be. The degree of emotional strain felt from this catch-22 varies – but it certainly will make its presence felt.